Tonight I was driving home from Recovery Group, and the sun was really bright in my eyes. I’m guessing it was for this other person too. Anyway, this car in front of me stopped at a green light. Had I not gotten over to my right, I would have rear ended them. When I got over though, I didn’t even think to check my blind spot, and another car went around me and honked. I am thankful that God gave me fast reflexes but also the other car who honked at me.
I am done with the computer training now. It took me 2 1/2 days to get it all finished. Today was my first day on the floor. It was good and actually went fairly fast. At least, once I got past the first two hours where I was trying to stay awake. So far, everyone is so friendly at this community. It’s very refreshing! I am thankful for this job.
I will also be moving soon. Either this weekend or next week. I will be moving into a transitional housing program. It is coming together and I know God is in the works.
And now it’s time for bed. I was going to take a 30 minute nap when I got home, but it ended up being at least an hour. I couldn’t believe I slept that long but my body needed it. And I still feel tired and ready for bed now.
Night all and God bless!
Yesterday was my first full day of work. It wasn’t to bad, except that I have two days worth of computer training, which I started yesterday. I was doing computer modules all day. By the end of the day, my brain felt like it was going to explode. I was so glad to come home. I have another day like that today. I am hoping to finish it today. The morning won’t be bad. Yesterday, I went through the morning fast. Then lunch hit, and it was all over after that. And by 5 O’clock, my brain was going at a snails pace. Everyone at work so far is really nice and caring. Of course I thought that at my other care giving job too. Though this just feels different.
Since I was overloaded last night, I didn’t have a post in me, but thought I would post this morning, to keep everyone updated.
Love & Peace
The drug test is figured out. There was a small amount of codeine, which I still don’t know where it came from. I wouldn’t think poppy seeds would would come up as codeine. Anyway, it was a small enough amount that they were able to count it as negative. So I go in for orientation today, and start the computer stuff tomorrow. It sounds like they are going to train me right away to be med tech, which will give me an extra dollar an hour. I am excited for this new chapter in my life!
Love & Peace
So at 11 pm, I went out for the last smoke of the night. As I started to walk to the picnic table, where I usually sit, in the backyard, a raccoon ran up the fence. He was probably about 15 ft from me or so. Instead of running away, he just sat at the top of the fence. He watched me and I watched him. Usually, I would go and stand closer to the house, but I wasn’t afraid this time. I talked to Ricky while I smoked, and then I said good-night, and went back inside. It was cool to be so close to a raccoon and have him just sit there and watch me. He was pretty cute too! A blessing from God!
I’m not sure if I mentioned that the first week into my therapy, I started smoking again. I’ve been smoking American Spirits (which are the “healthier” kind). They are also a bit more expensive then the Marlboro’s I used to smoke. I’ve been praying that God will show me when it’s time to quit, and give me the strength to do so. So tonight I went to buy some cigarettes. I figured in the long run, it would be cheaper to just buy a carton. It’s not. At least not where I bought them at. Anyway, where I bought them at, they are $64 for a carton. That’s a lot of money, when you don’t have much to begin with. I had exactly $64 in cash. I went ahead and bought them. Then as I was driving home, I started calculating how much it was costing me to smoke. Due to my stress and addiction, I’ve been smoking anywhere between 7-10 a day. That is half a pack if I round up to 10 cigarettes. After I got home, these are the numbers I came up with. I just rounded it to 10 a day to make it easier. The numbers are below…
Carton = $64.00
Pack = $6.40
Pack = 20 Cigarettes
Cigarette = $0.32 each
Day x10 = $3.20/day
Week = $22.40
Month = $89.60
Year = $1,075.20
Now some places I’ve bought cigarettes at, they cost $7.25 or so. That’s the one price I remember that was over $7. That puts the yearly price at $1,218. That’s almost a pay check right there.
So now my prayer has changed. My prayer now is for God to help me quit by the end of this carton of cigarettes. There have been times that I will be smoking a cigarette and when I get half done, I’m ready to be done for that time. There are also times where I smoke most of it but not quite all of it. I feel like God is helping me to wean off of them. I have also noticed that they aren’t helping as much as I felt they were in the beginning. My anxiety is still there, and I don’t even get the head rush I used to get. Sometimes, I feel like they burn my throat, at which point I put it out. This is usually about half way down the cigarette. I really want to cut back to 5 a day. I know this is going to be very hard to do. I need to get some suckers to help me, so that is something I can do tomorrow.
Smoking is a constant battle for me. The other part of my prayer is that I can be done smoking, permanently after I quit this time.
Love & Peace
On the way to my pet sitting gig, tonight, I saw a beautiful sunset. The following poem is my prayer.
Thank you, Lord, for the beautiful sunset
Your artwork across the sky
Thank you for your love and compassion
Your protection and guidance
Thank you for your Son
Who died on the cross
Thank you for the sun
That sits in the sky
You are a majestic God
I’ve got most of my stuff that is going to my new home, packed. Still a few things I will come back for Saturday. And then I will also need to clean the room/bathroom, I was living in. I will also need to do a few hours of cleaning that I didn’t get done this week. Then I will be on to unload at my new home. After that, I have a house sitting gig, so I won’t actually be staying at my new home until the 13th of the month.
God is SO amazing how He has taken care of my living situation in my life and other things too. The way He worked it out, is AWESOME! Our God is an Awesome God!!!