On the way to my pet sitting gig, tonight, I saw a beautiful sunset. The following poem is my prayer.
Thank you, Lord, for the beautiful sunset
Your artwork across the sky
Thank you for your love and compassion
Your protection and guidance
Thank you for your Son
Who died on the cross
Thank you for the sun
That sits in the sky
You are a majestic God
I took a load over to my new home, today. Not a big load but it was a load. I’m trying to take things as I get them organized. That way it’s not too overwhelming. Then when those things are out of the way, then I start another section. Doing it this way, helps me to stay a little more focused and less overwhelmed. I also ate supper while I was there. It was delicious! And it was vegan! Both my grandma’s are vegan, and I never thought vegan could be this good. Maybe it will work for me to go vegan permanently. I know it’s healthier, but it’s hard to give things up. They also use Stevia instead of sugar. It’s actually really good too. I’ve been wanting to give up the majority of sugar but don’t know how to give it up. It’s a major addiction for me. I am hoping living at my new home, will also show me new and better ways to have healthier eating habits.
Love & Peace
So I wanted to type this post but then thought, “no, I really need to go to bed.” I went and took a shower, but kept thinking about it, so am posting so that I can go to sleep.
I have addictive behavior. When I am actively cutting, it becomes an addiction. Then I gave up cutting and took up smoking, because it’s more acceptable. Then I quit smoking and went into overeating and gained weight again. Now for Lent, I gave up fast food, and have been smoking again. I have kept it to one a day, so that I can hide it from my aunt and uncle, but I feel the addiction looming overhead. I’m tired of being tied to these addictions. It’s tiring and stressful.
Tonight my prayer is, for God to take away this addictive behavior. Not just the cutting or smoking or overeating, or anything else I may pick up; but the behavior. To cut those chains from me so that I can be free from the addictions. ALL of the addictions. I want to be healthy physically, mentally, and emotionally and I feel like this is a start in that direction. God has to do it though, because I can’t. He’s got to break it from me.
That is all!
I am praying for a positive attitude towards my aunt and situation. I’m not sure how to get a positive attitude. God has to help me.
So over the last couple of days I have had extremely, bad lower back pain. It started out where it just felt stiff, but each day seemed to be worse. Then it got to the point where my knee was hurting and sometimes up my back. Then I also was has having some abdominal discomfort that was there occasionally. I took Ibeprofun once and Aleve once; they didn’t do anything. I soaked in the tub to try and relieve the pain but nothing seemed to work. Then last night when I went to bed, it didn’t matter what position I lay in, my back just hurt. I finally got up and went to take more Aleve. A friend had given me some earlier and I didn’t feel any difference in my back, though the knee pain went away. So after I took the Aleve at bedtime, I went back to bed and started praying. I cried out to God about my pain and how I don’t have the money to go to the doctor. I asked Him to heal me and make the pain go away. While I was crying, Wyatt came up next to me and started kissing me. He does that when I cry. He then snuggled in right next to me and I was able to finally go to sleep. This morning I woke up and the pain was gone. Right when I got up this morning, I did a few stretches, hoping that would help keep it away. I am still feeling a little stiff but I feel that way in the mornings anyway when I first get up. Since my job is a bit strenuous, I will take some more Aleve before going to work, though I believe that it was God’s power more then the Aleve, that has taken my pain away.
Thank you God, for hearing my prayer!
Love & Peace