About an hour ago, the fact that I am done in therapy, hit me hard. And all of a sudden. I got really sad and just wanted to cry, which I did a little. I am going to miss everyone, the support, and encouragement, they all gave.
Now it’s time for bed! I can barely keep my eyes open!
OH and D IS coming tomorrow around 10-1030am. I can’t wait!
This morning I woke up with anxiety. I also woke up with only a half an hour to get ready. Thankfully, I had showered and made my lunch last night. All I had to do was get a breakfast ready. I made my breakfast to go. I left only about 5 minutes late. So I was still having anxiety and then on the way to work, I got tearful and I’m not sure exactly why. I know part of it was that I went into work last night to talk to HR and saw a lot of my residents. This made me miss them. I was also still concerned that D hadn’t called me back yet. As I arrived to the treatment center (I was my usual early, so on time), my pastor texted me that she was praying for me. I know she prays for me but she doesn’t usually text me. So that made me feel a little better. We texted back and forth for a bit, and then shortly after we finished, D called. I felt instant relief and we talked for about 15 minutes. We had our community group for 30 minutes and then went back to our regular group. This put me at about 0945 am. We were getting ready to check in and all of sudden I had a migraine. I asked to go first to get it out of the way. I explained how I was feeling, and then was able to just try to listen to everyone else. It was hard though because the fluorescent lights were bright, and my eyes were hurting. My stomach felt upset, and I finally got up to get a wet paper towel or something for my eyes. I went to the front desk and asked if they had any clothes, which they didn’t. Then my stomach was feeling more upset, so I went to the bathroom and made myself throw up. I don’t normally do that. I don’t normally have a migraine to this extent. I don’t think I’ve ever thrown up from a headache before. So the relief from the migraine went away, but the head achy, tired blah feeling was still there. So I went back to group and waited until break, at which time, I decided to go home for the day. I hated leaving but I just couldn’t sit there any longer. So I talked to my therapist and then headed home. I had to stop and pick up my prescription and some Orchid Mix. I have some Orchids to save. Will talk about that on another post. I came home and took a nap, and woke up with a headache. Not as migraine-y, but still just as bothersome.
So that is my day so far. I was proud of myself this morning because instead of going through drive through when I was late getting going, I made a breakfast. That’s not the norm for me. I was also proud that I made the decision to take care of myself. I’m trying to look at things I did well each day. I am planning to start writing these things in a journal, so I can go back and look them over, to help remind me that I do, do things well.
Love & Peace