Category Archives: Boundaries

Boundaries

I mentioned in a previous post, how my brakes got changed over the weekend. Here’s another part to that story. So on Friday, I was supposed to go do some make-up hours for my aunt and uncle. I owe them 47 hours. Some of that time was because I was sick (mentally) and then in the hospital. They are still expecting me to owe them for that time, which on one hand I understand. The other hand, if it were my niece things would be different. Of course I’m more understanding of people then they are. It’s the way they go about it, that pisses me off. For Friday’s plans, I canceled.  It’s a 45 minute drive to get there from my place. I didn’t feel safe driving there with my brakes being as they were. The email I got in return from my aunt was to tell me how much it inconvenienced her and my uncle that I couldn’t come and clean. As if I could help my brakes going out. Or that I was just canceling to sit around and be lazy. I rescheduled for Monday.Then as of Saturday, I hadn’t heard from D yet, so figured he was busy and I went ahead and canceled for Monday. The next day I would be available was Thursday. I told my aunt I could come then. She said that wouldn’t work for them, and neither would the weekends. There is really no reason why any of those days wouldn’t work. She’s home all day unless they are dancing but that’s usually in the evening. Since I lived there a year, there was no reason why I would even need to bother her. Then on Sunday, D WAS able to fix my brakes. I very well could have gone Monday, but I was so overstimulated by the large crowd on Sunday, and know that I had therapy for two days after that, I chose to not say anything about it, and stayed home to relax. I need to take care of myself, and that comes first. Then tonight I was talking to my friend M, and she suggested sending an email to my aunt and uncle saying that right now I need to focus on the rest of my therapy and then finding a job. Once I do those things, we can regroup and discuss when and how I can pay them back for the hours I owe. I went with it. I sent the email already and am interested in seeing the response I get. M also suggested that once I get a job, I could pay them back in cash or part cash, so I wouldn’t owe them so many hours. I’m thinking I may do that also.

So that is the rest of the story. I have to blog about it because it makes me mad, angry and frustrated. I am learning on setting boundaries and this is one huge one that is very hard to set. I shouldn’t have to be worrying about it right now. I’ve got my own SHIT to work on, and that is top priority right now.

Devin